I had an interesting exchange with a friend recently which lead me to ponder the impact that social media has on dating. Chat rooms and online dating sites have been around for years and there are new ones popping up all the time. Social networking sites such as Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn have changed the game though. Now, if you have a brief encounter with someone yet, for whatever reason, neglect to exchange numbers, you can find them on Facebook and send a friend request. Or find them on Twitter and tweet them a message. Or find them on LinkedIn and request that they join your network. So with so many options the question becomes, “Where’s the line between showing interest and cyberstalking?”

Real Life Scenario: At an event, my friend met a guy who she found attractive. She chatted him up and before the end of the night they had exchanged Twitter handles. What they didn’t exchange; however, was phone numbers. Later, as my friend was kicking herself about that fact “what if he doesn’t go on Twitter often?,” my suggestion to her was to Google him. I figured she may get some hint as to how to contact him if that did turn out to be the case. After all, they hit it off, right? No harm, no foul. She took my advice and found his LinkedIn account. So I’m thinking, “Perfect! Now you can contact him on LinkedIn if the Twitter thing falls through. After all, you did discuss business.” She; however, was thinking, “I can’t contact him on LinkedIn. He’ll think I’m stalking him.” I told her, that it would be completely acceptable as long as it was done within the first few days after meeting. Any longer, and maybe it would seem a little odd.

Well, cut to a few weeks later. I asked her if she’d ever gotten in touch with him. She was really digging this guy after their first meeting so I thought for sure she would have reached out. To my dismay, she did not. She still felt that it would have been overstepping bounds. I disagree, but we’re friends so we can agree to disagree.

So, with social media making it so much easier to find and engage with people, how far is too far? As with most things in life, there’s no cut and dry answer. It depends. In this instance, I feel that it would have been completely appropriate for my friend to send an invitation to this guy via LinkedIn. Sending him a Facebook friend request; however, may have been a bit much. So as if navigating these choppy dating waters wasn’t complicated enough, now we’re adding googling and social media to the mix. Good or bad? Overall, I’d definitely say ‘good.’ At it’s core, social media is about engagement and relationship building. Sounds a lot like dating, no?